Updated: Apr 30, 2020
"If you want the rainbow, you've got to put up with rain. Do you know which 'philosopher' said that? Dolly Parton. And people say she's just a pair of tits." David Brent
Which 'tit' or 'tits' came up with the last stroke of genius at R&CA HQ? Gareth has got his fingerprints all over this dribble. I take great pleasure in 'outing' rogue chefs and operators for sugar coating the crisis, but this time it's the entire R&CA. They have clearly spent the COVID-19 'lunch break' down at the boozer and had one too many pints. Perhaps the oxygen bill hasn't been paid and supply has been cut to head office.
I've got a brilliant idea. Let's do a deal with Uber. You mean the multinational devil, who we did a deal with five years ago? Don't they rape our profits and charge a delivery fee on top? Aren't those vultures circling over the carcass of our industry dying from COVID-19? Why would we get in to bed with them?
All reasonable questions, but R&CA have fixed all that. They have not only talked the talk, they have walked the walk. They have got table thumping tough and floored the Ubernians. Yep, they've cut a better deal, a fairer deal. Drumroll... 0.5% 'discount' on delivery service fee, if you are an R&CA member and 'sign up today'. "Go and get the guitar".
R&CA, you have just alienated the entire industry that you purport to represent. My guess is that the few remaining members that forget to unsubscribe or remove the direct debit won't be overly excited with the 'savings' that you table in your media release. The high level savings business model, needs a bit of work. My kids could have knocked that up.
The mere fact that you have sort to partner with Uber, means that you have either lost the plot, sold your soul or both. The prank has backfired, clear out your desk.